ANTM Cycle 18 Episode 1

“The Brits Versus The Yanks”

Previously on America’s Next Top Model, Tyrant gave us the absolute debacle that was All Stars. What a train wreck. Allison lost twice… first to Trangelea and then to Pissa in a stunning reshoot of the finale. What a mess. Not even a hot mess. Just a mess. If she even mentions Tookie or Modelland in Cycle 18, I’ll lose it. So what does Miss Ego have in store for her loyal viewers (everyone else stopped watching when Whitney won) this Cycle? An old fashioned patriotic slug fest! It’s a British invasion. Seven former wannabes from BNTM will take on seven newbies from the good ol’ USA. I’ve never seen a single episode of the British version, so all of these girls get a fresh start with me. Also new this Cycle is Kelly Cutrone on the panel. Hopefully she’s got a spine and can stand up to Tyrant’s clumsy manipulations. Who will be the first to cry? Who will be the first to throw a fit? Who will have the best fake scream when Tyrant first walks in the room? Who will be eliminated tonight?

Welcome back peeps and welcome back to the delightfully off-topic second paragraph. To celebrate the start of a new Cycle, I’m only straying slightly off topic. I gotta give a shout out to fellow Homorazzi writer Donovan who did some amazing posts in between Cycles catching us up with former ANTM wannabes. Despite all our scathing hate for Tyrant, we still love the show, and every once and a while it actually leads to awesome careers for some of the girls… as long as they don’t win. Check out his Where Are They Know articles here to catch up with Lauren Brie, Katarzyna, Leslie, Fatima, Jane, Analeigh, and Raina. Snaps for Donovan!

On Team Brit, we’ve got Louise, Jasmia, Annaliese, Catherine, Sophie, Ashley, and Alisha. With Team Yank, we’ve got Laura, AzMarie, Ebony, Kyle, Candace, Mariah, and Seymone.

We start off with the wannabes all walking one by one through Universal Studios until a group of drummers march Nigel and Miss J out into the crowd. We get a brief glimpse into some of the girls. Mariah is the show’s first Native American wannabe. She’s gorge. Analiese is a well-spoken Londoner with some TV hosting background. Tyrant is NOT going to like the competition. Nigel looks as dapper as ever while Miss J of course looks appropriately ridiculous in a kilt and bandana ensemble. They welcome the girls as the final 14 and let them know about the international twist. Team Brit all cheered. The Yanks all stood there in stunned pouty silence. Uh oh. Living up to stereotypes already? Not good.

To kick the competition off, there’s a parade through Universal Studios which will be followed by a pose off showdown. These bitches gonna get all up in each other’s grills yo! Too Yank? How about… these birds ‘bout to bagga like a bulldog licking piss off a nettle huh! Before we get to all that though, there might be a little love connection on Yankee Doodle Do Me. Laura is Bisexual and LOVES the orgasms she gets from women and she thinks Lesbian AzMarie is drop dead sexy. Her opening come-on… “When I get drunk I take off all my clothes”. Don’t we all girl. Don’t we all. Classy Yanks. Then we get Team Brit’s Ashley popping into the mix. She’s Scottish and no one can understand what the hell she’s saying. Props to the editors for subtitling her “I’m so getting subtitled” line. I LOL’d.

BTW, the parade made me wanna barf. Overhyped patriotic forced fed fierceness. I’m guessing this pose off is gonna be the same.

Yep. It starts with the boxer announcer dude too. The girls all throw down a little stereotypical smack talk too before each walk off. First up were Analiese (UK)vs Laura (US). UK takes that one hands down. Laura looked like she was eating frogs and shitting out logs. Round 2 was Catharine (UK) vs Mariah (US). From what I could see, Mariah had the edge. Round 3 went to AzMarie (US) over Jasmia (UK). AzMarie can WALK. Round 4 was Ashley (UK) VS Candace (US). Ashley gets the win just for saying “betches” all cute and Scottish-like. Round 5 was a battle of ‘tude between the UK’s Alisha and The US’ Eboni. Alisha totes had more swagger. Or is it swahgah? Round 6 went to Katy Perry lookalike Kyle (US) over Sophie (UK). The last face off was between Louise (UK) and Seymone (US). They saved the plus-sized girls for last. Louise won that one HANDS DOWN. Overall, I give it to the Brits.

Back at the house, there’s lots of screaming as they obsess over the vomit of red, white and blue. They are separated by country and then the nonsense starts. Laura and AzMarie get naked and hit the pool. The British girls are horrified. Alisha laughs at the Yanks who are here to be horny as hell sexbombs while the Brits are there to model.

The next morning, Tyrant Mail arrives sending the girls to Siren Studios to meet Mr. Jay for their first shoot. The girls will be put into pairs (one from the US and one from the UK) and pose as iconic figures from each country. In an ANTM first, the shoot will be in 3D. Crazy.

Catherine (Queen Elizabeth 1) vs AzMarie (George Washington)

Catherine definitely had the better costume. AzMarie’s gold mini and powder wig were a hot mess. As for the photo, the judges liked the two together because they actually pulled off a narrative. Catherine definitely did better than AzMarie who is a little too stiff.

Candace (Janet Jackson) vs Analiese (Scary Spice Mel B)

(*Picture not available) Candace definitely scored with the better 90s inspired music video look. Sleek and tight. Analiese’s stress wasn’t tight enough for the real thing. The judges were all over the map on this. Nigel thought Analiese looked too angry (helloooo… Scary Spice) while Tyrant thought Candace didn’t look angry enough. WTF. Kelly Osbourne liked that they were dancing.

Laura (Madonna) vs Alisha (Elton John)

I love this match up, but let’s be honest… Madge totally thinks she’s British now. Laura by far gets the better outfit too. They could’ve done SO MUCH more with Elton John. And it shows in the picture. Alisha’s is a total fail. Nigel said it has nothing to do with him and Kelly Osbourne said she looks like a pissed off Aladdin. On the other hand, Laura nailed a great homage to Madge.

Sophie (Margaret Thatcher) vs Seymone (Michelle Obama)

I love this head to head too… but Sophie did not have it easy with that “dodgy” wig. Seymone really struggled too. This actually turned out to be my favourite photo. The judges too. Even though Seymone is pulling out dance class 101, she made it work. Sophie on the other hand is a kickass fierce Iron Lady. Tyrant loved Sophie too.

Kyle (Andy Warhol) vs Louise (Amy Winehouse)

This is a bizarre matchup. WTF. Why not put Warhol up against Lennon or something? Kyle definitely did better than Louise in the final pic. Her Warhol is interesting, while Louise’s Winehouse just looks stumpy.

Mariah (Pocahontas) vs Jasmia (John Lennon)

Just after I mention Lennon, here’s the wackiest pairing of the day. Another WTF. And, am I the only one that found it a little rich that they gave Pocahontas to Mariah? Kelly Cutrone was NOT loving the final image at all. She didn’t like the hair, she didn’t like the narrative, she wouldn’t know what to do with it as a publicist. Tyrant thought Jasmia was too Lenny Kravitz, not enough Lennon. Nigel didn’t think Mariah committed.

Eboni (Jackie Kennedy) vs Ashley (Princess Di)

This should’ve been the BEST pairing, but the stylists totally dropped the bomb on the looks. Cheap Halloween costumes. Neither girl delivered a great photo. Kelly Cutrone criticized Eboni for coming off as BCBG as opposed to aristocracy. Ashley was criticized for striking a masculine pose. I actually think Ashley did better at hitting Diana than Eboni did as Jackie O.

At panel, Tyrant finally showed her face. Too bad she made all the girls show up in heinous patriotic lipstick. She also went out of her way to ensure the girls that there no patriotic favoritism. YEAH right. Joining Tyrant, Nigel and Kelly Cutrone is guest judge Kelly Osbourne. Overall, it was not the strongest debut photoshoot… a lot of girls missed the mark and the styling was all over the place. But there was a clear winner… Seymone. WHAT? Bullshit. It should’ve been Sophie. She didn’t even get runner up. She lost that to Kyle. Behind Sophie were Laura, Catherine, Candace, Mariah, AzMarie, and Eboni.

All the American girls are now safe. Louise is safe. So are Alisha and Analiese. That leaves Jasmia and Ashley in the bottom two. Jasmia is leaving. Phew. I like Ashley, but Jasmia was totally screwed with heinous styling. Oh well. These Brits better step up!

• First call-out: Seymone Cohen-Fobish
• Bottom two: Ashley Brown & Jasmia Robinson
• Special guest: Kelly Osbourne, Oliver Tolentino, Michael Buffer
• Eliminated: Jasmia Robinson

Source: http://www.homorazzi.com

ANTM Cycle 18: British Invasion

CONTESTANTS:

From the United States

AzMarie Livingston

Candace Smith

Ebonee Davis

Kyle Gober

Laura LaFrate

Mariah Watchman

Seymone Roth

From the United Kingdom

Alisha White

Annaliese Dayes

Ashley Brown

Catherine Thomas

Jasmia Robinson

Louise Watts

Sophie Sumner

America's Next Top Model All-Stars

Tyra Banks returns this fall for Cycle 17 of "America's Next Top Model," and she's bringing back some familiar faces for the reality show's first-ever "All-Stars" season. To prepare for this week's premiere, click through this slideshow to find out what the 14 ladies seeking another chance at the "ANTM" title have been up to since they were last on the show.

THE CONTESTANTS:

Alexandria Everett, 22, Cycle 16

Alexandria placed fourth during the last season of "America's Next Top Model." Despite producing some of the best photos throughout Cycle 16, Alexandria's bad attitude got her into trouble with her fellow contestants and with the judges. Since appearing on the show, Alexandria has modeled for a couple of SoCal magazines and clothing lines 80s Purple and BTFL People.

Allison Harvard, 23, Cycle 12

Allison performed consistently well during Cycle 12, placing her as the season's runner-up contestant. Even though she struggled with versatility, her unique, doll-like face was favored by the judges. Allison hasn't done much fashion modeling since her time on "America's Next Top Model," but her works of art and strange penchant for blood have made her an Internet celebrity.

Angelea Preston, 25, Cycle 14

Angelea's explosive personality during Cycle 14 of "America's Next Top Model" got her the reputation of being a troublemaker. She was often the source of all the drama that went down in the house and constantly picked fights with the other girls. Catfights aside, Angelea landed in fourth place that season since the judges constantly praised her for her work on-camera and determination during photo shoot challenges. After the show, the 25-year-old has participated in N.Y. Fashion Week, walking for the Sachika twins and Richie Rich shows, and she was recently cast in a film called "Breathe."

Bianca Golden, 22, Cycle 9

Another "Top Model" known for causing trouble, Bianca finished in fourth place during Cycle 9. She was known for her loud and abrasive demeanor and was considered the season's villain. One of Bianca's most memorable moments came from her makeover meltdown when Tyra shaved her head. After Cycle 9, Bianca walked in a couple of "Project Runway" finale shows, appeared on the pages of Essence and Cosmopolitan magazines, and most recently was in a Macy's commercial.

Bre Scullark, 26, Cycle 5

Bre will forever be known for freaking out over her stolen granola bars on Cycle 5 of "America's Next Top Model." Lisa D'Amato (a Cycle 5 contestant who will also be joining the show this season) recently admitted to taking the granola bars, so putting the two back together for "All-Stars" could be very interesting. Bre finished third on "ANTM" and quickly moved on to doing a handful of commercial spots, and she has been featured in a bunch of magazines. She was also seen on "American Idol" alum Ruben Studdard's "Change Me" music video.

Brittany Brower, 29, Cycle 4

On Cycle 4 of "America's Next Top Model," the judges criticized Brittany for looking too sexy in her photos. When she reeled it in, the judges then decided that she was losing her personality and she was consequently eliminated. Brittany has since sashayed her way down the catwalks of J.Lo, Calvin Klein, and House of Dereon, and her modeling credits include Von Dutch and Carlos Santana shoes. She was also named as one of Maxim magazine's Hottest Women of Reality TV. Nowadays, Brittany runs her own training workshops for aspiring models. Will she be giving her competitors any advice this season?

Camille McDonald, 33, Cycle 2

Queen bee Camille managed to snag a final five spot during the second cycle of "America's Next Top Model" despite her arrogant and stubborn attitude. Since the show, Camille moved to Europe and appeared on the runways of Escada, Wolfords of London, and LBO3. When she returned to New York, Camille worked as an intern for Diane von Furstenberg.

Dominique Reighard, 27, Cycle 10

Dominique is known for being the girl Tyra opened an extra slot for on Cycle 10 of "America's Next Top Model." Dominique's main criticism from the judges was that her facial features were "very drag," and she finished fourth. Tyra still saw potential in Dominique and casted her in the spin-off "Modelville," where she won and, as a result, is the spokesperson for Carol's Daughter, a line of beauty products.

Isis King, 25, Cycle 11

On the 11th cycle of "America's Next Top Model," Isis became the first (and so far only) transgender contestant to compete on the show. Isis has since completed her gender reassignment surgery and is now one of the most recognized transgenders on television. She currently works as a freelance model.

Kayla Ferrel, 20, Cycle 15

Kayla's goal on Cycle 15 of "America's Next Top Model" was to become the first out lesbian winner. One of the season's strongest contenders with consistently strong photos, Kayla came in fourth place. Maybe she'll have better luck this time around. Kayla's modeled in eyewear and couture fashion ads since being eliminated from the show.

Laura Kirkpatrick, 22, Cycle 13

Laura appeared on Cycle 13 of "America's Next Top Model," the season that featured petite girls no taller than 5'7". The Southern sweetheart is one of the show's most-loved contestants for her charming personality. On top of her bubbly attitude, Laura also produced strong photos that landed her in the final two that season. Though Laura has appeared in a number of runway shows and magazines, her current claim to fame is the dyslexia foundation she started called "The Beautiful Minds."

Lisa D'Amato, 30, Cycle 5

By far one of the weirdest contestants to ever compete on "America's Next Top Model," Lisa is probably most remembered for the many wigs she donned on the show and for befriending a tree in the backyard that she called "Cousin It." After placing sixth on the show, Lisa's wild behavior got her a spot on Season 3 of "Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew." She's since modeled for magazines and even appeared in television commercials for Old Navy and Gap. When she's not modeling, Lisa is singing. She just released her sophomore album titled "Flippin' the Bird," and one of her singles was featured on HBO's "Entourage."

Shannon Stewart, 27, Cycle 1

Shannon, known for being religious and refusing to participate in the nude photo shoot, was the runner-up in the first cycle of "America's Next Top Model." After the show, Shannon continued to model and even competed in the Miss Ohio USA competition in 2004, where she placed second. She returned to the pageant in 2006, but made it only to the semifinals.

Sheena Sakai, 24, Cycle 11

The curvy Sheena competed on Cycle 11 of "America's Next Top Model," where it was discovered that she had breast implants. Her suggestive poses during photo shoots landed her in sixth place. Since the show, Sheena has done stunts for the movie "Tropic Thunder" and had an uncredited appearance on The CW's "Gossip Girl."

ANTM CYCLE 17:ALL STARS

Season Premiere Sept 14, 2011

america's next top model

CYCLE 1:

Premiere date:

May 20, 2003

Destination:

Paris

Winner:

Adrianne Curry

CYCLE 2:

Premiere date:

January 13, 2004

Destination:

Milan

Winner:

Yoanna House

CYCLE 3:

Premiere date:

September 22, 2004

Destination:

Tokyo

Winner:

Eva Pigford

CYCLE 4:

Premiere date:

March 2, 2005

Destination:

Cape Town

Winner:

Naima Mora

CYCLE 5:

Premiere date:

September 21, 2005

Destination:

London

Winner:

Nicole Linkletter

CYCLE 6:

Premiere date:

March 8, 2006

Destination:

Bangkok &Phuket

Winner:

Danielle Evans

CYCLE 7:

Premiere date:

September 20, 2006

Destination:

Barcelona

Winner:

CariDee English

CYCLE 8:

Premiere date:

February 28, 2007

Destination:

Sydney

Winner:

Jaslene Gonzalez

CYCLE 9:

Premiere date:

September 19, 2007

Destination:

Shanghai & Beijing

Winner:

Saleisha Stowers

CYCLE 10:

Premiere date:

February 20, 2008

Destination:

Rome

Winner:

Whitney Thompson

CYCLE 11:

Premiere date:

September 3, 2008

Destination:

Amsterdam

Winner:

McKey Sullivan

CYCLE 12:

Premiere date:

March 4, 2009

Destination:

São Paulo

Winner:

Teyona Anderson

CYCLE 13:

Premiere date:

September 9, 2009

Destination:

Maui

Winner:

Nicole Fox

CYCLE 14:

Premiere date:

March 10, 2010

Destination:

Auckland & Queenstown

Winner:

Krista White

CYCLE 15:

Premiere date:

September 8, 2010

Destination:

Venice & Milan

Winner:

Ann Ward

CYCLE 16:

Premiere date:

February 23, 2011

Destination:

Marrakesh

Winner:

Brittani Kline